Part of the discussion this week with my potential Dom is what I call Him, and how we identify with each other. Although I do have my littler side, it’s more mischievous and brattish, than little per se. So, we agreed on Sir.
But this being me, it got me thinking about how I want to be seen… In simplistic terms, TSH gets the sillier side of me, Mr Biter gets the brat. TSH and I have hot kinky sex. Mr Biter and I seem to be more vanilla, seeking a shared sensual experience.
But there’s other sides of me, too. My blog is not called ‘Wriggly Kitty’ for nothing… I like being called kitty, or kitten and the sense of security it brings. It’s not pet play, but I do have aspects of cat, generally keep it well-guarded from anyone other than TSH. There’s the purring when I’m in my happy place during play… the face-nuzzling and scritches… It’s my way of letting go, just a little bit, for a short period of time.
I wore my cat ears to the family meal on Christmas day, and after answering everyone’s “why are you wearing cat ears?” with “why shouldn’t I wear cat ears?” it became a non-issue. Everyone probably put it down to it being one of my idiosyncracies, but I felt happy wearing them…
There’s the brattish side of me that seems to come out with Mr Biter. But mostly when we’re messaging, rather than in real life. It’s like we have an online version of us and a real life version of us, and they’re both very different.
Mr Biter also is starting to see a little bit of my silly side… both him and TSH have had to suffer me turning all my stuffed toys to face away from what we’re doing, to ‘protect their innocence’. And I definitely like it when the fun side of me comes out, as I’m normally so serious. Both of them seem to like it, too.
Even TSH, horrified at the implications, as he listened to my two-sided monologue about whether, if he bought the Millennium Falcon pentaptych that keeps being advertised to him on FaceBook, I should add some glitter pen art to it* couldn’t stop laughing.
And there’s “girl”… There are some women who definitely don’t identify as girl, but I HATE being called ma’am, Mrs, madam etc… as I really don’t identify with those labels. I try and stick to Ms if I have to, and there’s an equal amount of feminism and self-identity in that.
Mr Biter also seems to have developed a nickname for me. It’s a phrase that I could easily be called during kinky play, but wouldn’t work in the intended context, due to it being otherwise used, and how I’ve associated it.
The truth of the matter though, is that I’m different things to different people. The energy that I have with one person isn’t the same with another, so different aspects of me get drawn out.
So, it remains to be seen what the dynamic with Sir will end up being. It’ll be interesting to find out…